Year: 2017

Self-Appreciation Tool

Photo credit: ximagination

 

Here’s a tool to use that will support you in building a better self-image and higher self-confidence:

 

Self-appreciation Tool

This tool works great when you sincerely appreciate yourself for your gifts, skills, talents and also accomplishments (big or small) you’ve done.  Take a piece of paper and write down 3 to 5 gifts, skills, talents and/or accomplishments you appreciate yourself for.  You may already know what these are, but if you don’t, think about those things you love to do, or skills people compliment you on, and also think about what you’ve done to help out your friends, co-workers, family and/or your community.

 

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Now, sit in a comfortable chair, with both feet on the ground, and relax. Feel in your heart a sincere appreciation you have for someone in your life.  Keep FEELING the appreciation for this person for a few minutes.  Now, pick one of the skills or gifts you have and start appreciation yourself for this.   Continue feeling this for a few minutes, with sincere gratitude for yourself!  You’ll find yourself being uplifted and feeling better!

 

You’re invited to do this on a daily basis, and you’ll find you’ll benefit by recognizing the good of who you are. Remember that it’s not egotistical to appreciate yourself.  Realize that the more you appreciate yourself, the more you’re able to give to others!

 

Here’s to your joy and great self-confidence!

Kate Heartsong

Conditioning and Self-Confidence

Conditioning and Self-Confidence

Did you know where our self-confidence comes from?  It’s from our being conditioned and programmed.

The bulk of our conditioning comes mainly from birth through the age of seven.  It continues into adulthood but the most influential conditioning happens from those precious early years of life. It happens through the modeling of our parents and other authority figures, through trauma and through impactful life experiences.  It also happens from our repeating certain words, phrases and/or feelings over and over again, during our whole lifetime.

It’s fascinating to me that science proves the physiology that’s associated with our conditioning, which leads to our beliefs.  For example, Dr. Joe Dispeza, in his first book How to Evolve your Brain, the Science of Changing Your Mind, explains that through repeatedly hearing or seeing something, our brain’s neurons become stimulated and come together to form neuro pathways.   These in turn become triggered later in life when we experience a similar incident to the early conditioning.  For example, a person repeatedly hearing from her parents that she’s no good may very well grow up believing this (false) belief about herself.

Another example of conditioning is, let’s say a person had parents who fought all the time.  To that person, a “normal” relationship represents fighting.  Or how about what I heard from my dad about money: “Money is scarce”.  I grew up believing just that.  For many years, I had very little money as a result of this conditioning.  How many of you grew up hearing about money, and how has that influenced you today?

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Because early conditioning leads our beliefs, we grow up experiencing the results of these beliefs. These results may or may not be what we find helpful in our lives.  It may have led to low self-esteem and confidence. The good news is we can improve our confidence by changing the beliefs through conditioning!  We CAN re-program ourselves by using various tools and processes!

Check out my other blogs on this website for tips on how to build self-confidence.

Here’s to your confidence, joy, empowerment and fun!

Kate Heartsong

Reflections on Gratitude

Two summers ago, I had the great blessing to visit for three weeks my family who live in Germany.  I have sixteen relatives there, more than here in America.  My mom was born in Germany but came here to America in her late twenties and spent the rest of her life here in the Denver, Colorado area (she’s been gone now for eight years…..).

You know the feeling when you haven’t seen someone for a long time, and when you do, it feels like no time has passed since the last time you saw them?  Well, that’s how it felt for me seeing all my relatives.  A happy reunion with them!

I experienced a deep sense of gratitude for being able to visit, for being at my mom’s homeland and to rest and relax.  Also,everything was taken care of for me and I sure felt provided for in many ways!  This gave me the “playground” to experience what it’s like to be provided for and I decided to bring this feeling, as well as being relaxed, into my life here at home to do my best to keep these attributes as part of my daily living.

It’s beneficial for all of us to live life knowing we already are provided with everything we need.  This leads us to be more relaxed and happy.  I know it’s far easier said than done though!  In your daily hectic lives, how do you relax?  How do you remember (or, how do you believe that)  all is provided for you?  You can better experience this type of living by living mindfully, having faith, trusting yourself and Spirit, and being open to receive, along with and a number of other life strategies and tools.  Many of these strategies and tools are easier said than done, but it’s possible!

See below for two tips and tools for how you can live in a more relaxed manner and feel more provided for, which results in being happier.

Until next time,
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Namaste,
Kate Heartsong

Empowering Tips and Tools –  promoting relaxation and feeling provided for

 – Reflect on what, in your life, is going right and reflect on how you always have had a roof over your head, enough food to eat and have family and friends.  Sure there may have been some lean times or some times without work, but isn’t it true that you’ve always come out of those times and have always been provided for?

– Sit in meditation for fifteen minutes, setting an intention before you start to focus on deep relaxation.  As you meditate, remember a time when you felt so rested and relaxed; focus on that feeling for a while and just bath in it.  Now choose to take this feeling and give it a name, or associate a picture, scenery or smell to it and now create an anchor.  This anchor allows you to take that relaxed feeling and when you think of the picture, name or smell to it, you invoke or stimulate yourself into feeling that relaxed feeling when you’re in your day to day life.

Reach Your Highest Potential !

Photo credit: lzflzf

 

Wouldn’t it be awesome for you to soar in your life?  To live your highest potential and authenticity?  Yes indeed!

How can you?  Here are three ways that support you in reaching your highest potential and authenticity:

1). Be true to yourself.   This means that you are aware of who you are, you’re aware of your values, beliefs and boundaries, and you LIVE by them!  This is true authenticity.  And you reach your highest potential when being true to yourself because….. drum roll please!……   when you honor and live in your authenticity, you’re in alignment with the true you!  And this results in more joyful living.
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2). Recognize the gifts and skills you have and use them!   This way, once again, you’re in alignment with the awesome person you are, and sharing your gifts and skills also allows you to LIVE in service to others, by giving the “true you”.

3). Be willing to see and understand the gifts and lessons of each experience you have.  Even those  – what we label  –  as “negative” actually have gifts in them.  For example, I heard many years ago about a man who’s son was killed by gang members.  Well, after he grieved, he forgave the man who killed his son.  He also created a nonprofit to help many at-risk youth, who, as a result of this nonprofit, are no longer at risk!  Umm…  we never know what the ripple effects are in our lives, or the lives of others, from experiences (“good” or “bad”) we have.

As always, it’s my honor to send out these monthly enewsletters.  It’s one of my gifts I love to share with you !

Building Self-Confidence

Photo credit: lzflzf

 

Self-confidence is an important foundation for all areas of our lives.

Self-confidence:

– impacts how we interact with others and how we relate to ourselves

– effects how we perform at our jobs or our own business

– is responsible for how easy or hard we experience life changes

– gives us our ability (or inability) to step outside of our comfort zone and try new experiences

– and more

We all benefit from having a healthy level of self-confidence, whether it’s the type of self-confidence that’s related to self-esteem, related to making life changes, or the confidence related to self-efficacy (the level of confidence you have regarding receiving results from the effort you put out).

Building self-confidence and maintaining this is all an inside job.  It’s up to you to take effective action steps such as learning and using tools and processes.  Be willing to take the bull by the horns.  No one else can do it for you!  In this, and the future confidence articles, I’ll be sharing some valuable tools for you to use.

Some of the symptoms of low self-confidence include frequently saying sorry, feeling depressed, having self-doubt, making mistakes and covering them up so others don’t think bad of you or asking for something you want.

So, you may be asking “How can I raise my self-confidence”?  Well, one of several effective ways is to create a more positive and better belief about yourself.   This is done through affirmations and visualizations, and are much more effective when you feel the emotions that are associated with the new beliefs you want to create.

You’re invited to discover a process that I call “The Feeling Process”. This will help you build your self-confidence:
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1) Become aware of what belief or behavior you want to change.

Example:  Have less self-criticism

2) Create a replacement belief or behavior and then create a visual representation and/or an affirmation

Example:  The replacement behavior is: Use more positive self-talk.

Visualize a big beautiful red heart that represents positively talking to yourself instead of criticizing yourself.

3) Now imagine this visual representation and/or say the affirmation, and at the same time, feel the emotion of how it feels to have this new belief or behavior.  Just use your imagination and make believe.  Have fun with this! It’s best to do this for a few minutes or more.

Example:   Visualize the big beautiful red heart coming lovingly towards you.  With intention, feel the emotion of love and appreciation absorbing you.  This emotion can be invoked by thinking of a loved one or remembering a positive experience.

Say positive statements such as “I appreciate you!”

You’ll benefit by doing this daily several times a day.  The more you do this, the better.  It has a cumulative effect too!  So, if this process resonates with you, use it. You’ll love the benefits you receive!

There are other processes and tools that you can use to build your confidence; you’ll learn another one in the next blog. You’ll also discover that it’s through conditioning that creates your self-confidence.

Here’s to your confidence, joy, empowerment and fun!

What Brings You Joy?

What Brings You Joy?

How was your summer? Filled with joy and fun I hope! Ah, and “suddenly” (it feels that way, right!)  here it is once again, the Labor Day holiday!  It came so fast for me, as it does for many people.

My question for you: to what are you “laboring in?” Is your life difficult, where you feel you’re going uphill? Or, are you experiencing life with joy?

Remember it’s a choice whether we live with labor and burden, or joy and lightness. I know it’s not always easy to choose, but it’s possible to choose joy!

Another question for you to ponder:  Are you working in a job, career or your own business in an area that brings you joy?  Do you wake up excited to work?   If not, consider what does bring you joy and what brings out your natural gifts and skills, and then explore what it would take to make the change into doing the work you love!

Here are two tips on living life in more joy:

1.Remember that what we focus on gets bigger, so keep this in mind in your daily life. Also, be aware of your thoughts and switch to more positive ones when you’re dwelling on worry, anxious or fearful thoughts.
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2. Feel the blessings you already have in your life.  Write down 3 each morning and 3 before bed, and feel these blessings!  This helps you focus on the positive in your life.

My wish for you is great joy!

Namaste,

Kate

 

Share your comments here!  It’s always great to hear from you.

Webinar Recording: “It’s From the Inside Out” – Change IS Possible!

Photo: ximagination

Change IS Possible!

I’m excited to share with you a one hour recording of the webinar I did through Cathy Liska’s Center for Coaching Certification on August 18, 2017.  Here, I talk about:

  • The science that proves we create our lives
  • A technique to RE-program beliefs that don’t work for you, resulting in creating more of what you want!
  • Two simple tools to raise your confidence.

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Here’s the link.  Enjoy!      It’s From the Inside Out! with Kate Heartsong

Be sure to share your comments here!  I’d love to hear from you!

5 Signs You Have Low Self-Confidence

Photo credit ximagination

5 Signs You Have Low Self-Confidence

 

  1. You’re afraid someone will find out about a little mistake – When a person has low self-confidence, they don’t want others to think badly of them, and one way this is demonstrated is a fear others will find out they made a mistake.

 

  1. You don’t like to take a chance on doing something that’s outside your comfort zone – One reason for this is because you’re afraid you might fail, and that hurts your already low self-esteem or confidence.

 

  1. You’re afraid to share your opinion – Because, if you do, you’re afraid someone may not like it, and you don’t want rejection.

 

  1. You’re a people pleaser – You do your best to be sure others like you, because, again, you don’t want to be rejected.

 

  1. You’re self-critical – You tend to beat yourself up, berate yourself, and just overall have negative self-talk.

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See below for two tools to assist you in gaining a higher level of self-confidence, and also be sure to look for next month’s article!.

 

What you can do about raising your self-confidence.

 

  1. Start appreciating the skills and gifts you have! Take an inventory of these, then sincerely feel some appreciation for yourself, several times a day.  This has a magic way of building more “feel good” feelings about what you already have, which then helps you realize you DO have value!

 

  1. Become aware of how you talk to yourself. You may be surprised to see how often you have negative language. Choose to use positive self-talk instead.   Certainly this may be easier said than done, but AWARENESS is the key!  Once you are aware, then you can easier change the old habits of self-criticism, and replace with more positive self-talk.

I would love to hear your comments.  Feel free to share here with us!

 

3 Traits All Confident People Have

 

Photo credit: Michael Simons

3 Traits All Confident People Have

  • They believe in themselves.  Confident people know the gifts and skills they offer and they know themselves well; they recognize the good they offer and realize their self-worth.  This creates a stronger belief in themselves.  Confident people believing in themselves is not being egotistical because they ALSO see the good and the value in everyone else.

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  • They use positive self-talk. Confident people use positive language when talking to themselves instead of beating themselves up.  Have you noticed a confident, upbeat person walking into the room?  You can bet they appreciate themselves and use positive self-talk.

 

  • They surround themselves with positive, uplifting situations, events and people. Like attracts like.  We facilitate more positive attitude when we do positive things like watch happy movies and minimize negative news or people.

Piece of the Puzzle

Photo by Maxxyustas

 

It’s absolutely necessary (and NOT egotistical!) to know your value and also your contribution to your family and friends, to your community and also to the whole of humanity!  You’re an important and needed piece of the puzzle of humanity.  Building your self-confidence will support you knowing and living this.

We all have our own personal piece of the puzzle, with our unique combination of gifts and skills and personality traits.  This contributes to the intricacies of the whole, whether it’s the whole of a community we live in, the whole of our family or the whole of the planet.

There is a synergy that emerges as a result of all people interacting with one another, where they’re showing up contributing their own pieces of the puzzle.  Building our self-confidence, getting to know ourselves better and honoring who we are assists in claiming our knowing that we are an important component of all life.  This is also a great way to better understand that we’re all interconnected with each other and with all of life.

Claim your greatness and continue to build your self-confidence!
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Your comments are valuable.  Share with us here your thoughts on this article.

 

 

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